The art of thoughtful conversation: nine questions to ask while hunkering down in a cabin

Gratitude is not always the easiest emotion to conjure. But, being sat facing a friend, loved one or family member will likely help you remember and once you start, it might well just start tumbling out. Practising gratitude about your family, community, health, job or even your pet – whatever it is you are grateful for – can have a wealth of benefits akin to mindfulness. You can expect a better mood, improved sleep, lowered stress, reduced inflammation and more.

Actually taking the time to think, above and beyond being a nice trip down memory lane, sparks a little introspection – and allows you to talk about your own personal growth. What again you’re grateful for, or even might spark some ideas about where you’re going next, and the attitude you’ll bring with you. It can also allow you to realise some values that you might not have clicked that you have, some parts of yourself that you didn’t realise, you’re actually very proud of. Better yet, they might have some advice you couldn’t have imagined.

We live in an age where following your dreams has never been easier. Travelling the world is relatively simple, if you’re starting a business – there’s reams of help on the internet, learning a new skills – much the same. Take the time to bounce some ideas of your travel buddy. Find out what big ideas they’ve yet to accomplish are, who they’d really be if they could. You might just learn something you never knew about them, or you.

Surrounded by rolling fields, the swaying tree canopies and the call of birdsong, is, pretty much, the best place to be thinking about this. It’s all too easy to forget the big wild world out there, and the lessons we learn from it when we spend a decent bit of time in it. What takeaways do you have when you go away and spend some time nature? What do you think you could do to improve your life at home – what have you already learned? You might be surprised.

What ‘home’ means to you can change a lot as you grow older, as you move house, go to university, or rent your first place. Perhaps the first time you move in with friends, or move in with your first partner – maybe then, you might start wondering, what is a home? What makes it that for me? What does it need to have, and what must it not? What does it mean to belong, and what experiences have you had that lead to your values on this? A deeply revealing question to ask.

It’d be really nice if they answered ‘you’ wouldn’t it? And maybe they will. But the real answer might be a lot more interesting, and potentially more revealing. You’ll end up with all sorts of stories, often the wild and fascinating kind, and maybe even some stories you’ve never heard before. Learning who the other person reveres might tell you a lot about their values, hopes for the future, and who they’d like to become.

You’ve asked the hard stuff, you’ve delved into some really meaningful things. Why not lean a little into something joyful? Asking about what you’d do one day without any limitations could be a lot of fun. Find out what their secret ‘me time’ activities are – are they all about taking baths? Doing self care? Would they want to do more for others? Would they be restful or active, go shopping, bar hopping, meeting people or just doing what you are right now, enjoying some down time in a cabin out in nature?

When we get to know one another in the office, this is one of the first things we ask. And as simple and childlike as it sounds, it’s actually pretty revealing, both to learn about someone else, and to think about for yourself. At first glance, you’re tempted to think of something cool and exotic – but suddenly realise that there's something far less obvious that fits to a tee. It can lead to some interesting ideas about what you enjoy in life and make it a little clearer where you’d like to go from here.

No one likes to think about the end. Of anything. The end of a film, the bottom of a tasty bottle of red, the end of a glamping stay or even… that end. But a little momento mori can go a long way towards making the journey all the more worth it. And knowing how you might be remembered can keep us focused on what we achieve today. Ask away, and find out what legacy your favourite people imagine leaving behind – it might just give you some ideas too